Today at work I had this customer, an older black woman, very sweet, very proper. She said that her Reverend said she should see me, I do know her Reverend- through my job only. He and I have had many encounters as he seems to feel that I should not do my job where he is concerned as he is a man of the Lord. I on the other hand do not believe that his being a man of the Lord makes him exempt from paying his debts. We had a very nice conversation while I helped her with her situation. When the work was done she thanked me for my help then went on to say that the Reverend had told her about my "situation". I asked " what situation would that be? " She said he told her I was divorced and she thought that was sad. I told her that I was not sad but quite the opposite I am happy. She looked like she was taken aback by that statement. She went on to say she and the Reverend felt that couples should stay married " at all costs ". I asked " just exactly what does that mean ? At all costs? " She said " no matter what if you enter into marriage under the Lord you should remain in the marriage under the Lord ". By this time I was feeling just a bit pissed off so I sarcastically said " Is that the Reverends idea or the Lord's ? She said both, the Reverend preaches it but the Lord said it " I again sarcastically said " Did the Lord tell you this personally? What in a phone call? fax? email? letter? just how did the Lord impart this information to you so that you could be here today to relay it to me? She said " It's in the Bible " I said so you believe that people should stay together no matter what? She said " Yes it's the right thing to do ". I said no matter what they may do to each other, no matter how much pain they might inflict upon each other, no matter if there is abuse, infidelity, dishonor or disloyalty. She held her ground and said " Yes , no one said it would be easy ". She told me I should come to hear the Reverend preach, and ask the Lord's forgiveness. This woman does not know me, she does not know my situation, she does not know the particulars, all she knows is that the Reverend told her I was divorced. I asked her if the Reverend had told her to talk to me about this, she said yes. So... I told her she could tell the Reverend that he would never find me in his audience listening to him preach, that I would not be donating money towards his " love offering " and that maybe he himself should be asking the Lord for forgiveness, after all I did know alot about his " situation ". And since I do know what I know- I will be staying away from his brand of worship " at all costs ".
She told me she would pray for me and she left.
So really what exactly is " at all costs"? Just what does the Lord think about this subject?
Does the Reverend always use sweet little old ladies as his muscle? What does the Lord think about that?!
1 comment:
Pat,
I hope you are well. It's been awhile since I came to your blog. We have had quite the busy, up and down two months.
I sense such hostility in this post. If you are interested in knowing what God says about divorce, you should check out the gospel of matthew, which contains some very clear instruction. What you will find is that divorce is only permitted by the aggreived spouse when there is adultery. Even though adultery is grounds for divorce, it still wouldn't cause me to get divorced because I'm also called to forgive. So for me, there really isn't any grounds for it. I can imagine a seperation in certain extreme situations, but not divorce.
John Macarthur, at Grace to you, actually did a very good 7 part series (yes 7!!) on what the bible says about divorce. Very informative.
Your Reverand is preaching the word of God. Do not be angry with him. It is his duty and the duty of all who claim to follow the Lord. Of course he doesn't know your situation. But your situation, my situation, anyone's situation doesn't change God's Word one itty bit.
When we make an oath to be married, we make an oath to God. It's a promise to him to honor and cherish your spouse and for better or worse, which means. . . for better or worse. The situation, the feelings, the hurt, the dissapointment is not the issue. the issue is a person's commitment to his/her promise and his/her committment to God. It is not that I'm not sympathetic to anyone's situation. There are some relationships in which a seperation is warranted for Paul says we are called to live in peace. But as far as divorce, the bible is very, very clear on this. Whether a person likes it or disgrees with it is a seperate issue.
I remember when Aggie and I briefly saw a marriage counselor. I went to one session. When I got home, I said to myself "John, this is a simple issue. You are either going to trust God and follow his commands and stay together or your not. Because no matter how often you sit and talk about issues, that is the bottom line." My feelings or desires were not relevant. Oh, they were to me. But really, i'm only entitled to judgement anyway for the sin in my life and it is only through God's grace, and jesus' death that I find forgiveness. So I cannot call him Lord, then do what I want to do. Salvation is free. The gift of eternal life is free. But it costs us something because we give up the "me" and replace it with "Him"
I don't know where you are spiritually. I don't even know your situation and what I do know I would not broadcast in a public forum. Suffice to say, I believe you were wronged and that is very unfortunate. I have compassion for you (not pity) but compassion because I care about you.
But if you really want to know what the bible says on this issue, don't expect the email, voicemail, or audible voice as referenced in your post. Ask God to speak to you through his Word and read what it says, pray over it. Again, I totally recommend you go to the Grace to You website and read the series. It will only cost you some time.
Hope to see you soon and I hope everyone is good down there in NC. You are always welcome to meet your boys at our place anytime.
John
Post a Comment